1. $ sudo passwd root <br/>
    [enter new ridiculous root password. Remember it.]
 2. Log/ssh into pi as root using ridiculous password.
 3. $ usermod -l newname -d /home/newname -m oldname
 4. $ ls -al /home/ <br/>
    [See that you've changed the user & home folder. Yay. Oh.. gotta change the group...] <br/>
 5. $ groupmod --new-name newname oldname
 6. $ ls -al /home/ <br/>
    [See that user, group & home folder are changed. Yay!] <br/>
 7. $ exit <br/>
    (Now log in as newname. Yay!)<br/>
    But wait....<br/>
    Now you should reset root so others can't brute-force your ridiculous password.
 8. $ sudo passwd -l root<br/>
    (Oh, and if you REALLY care... edit /etc/ssh/sshd_config, setting "PermitRootLogin no", and restart that service.)

Then you'll have to change any additional changes in any scripts/setups that refer to 'pi'... JOY.